life

my latest creation

which 1 iz better

comment the above art plz
dat is a blog template bakground i made for a frend of mine

ABCD

The bookstore has dozens of books that teach children the alphabet. Some do it through popular characters such as Big Bird and Elmo, others by showing everyday life: 'F' is always for 'Firefighter,' 'K' is for 'Kite,' and 'O' is for 'Outsourcing.' Then there's one that's rather popular in the big city, written by a mother to help her children understand their father's drug and alcohol problems:

A is for 'Arrest.' It's what the police do when they take Daddy away; he gets to ride in a cool car and doesn't have to pay.

B is for 'Bail.' It's the money we pay to get Daddy out of jail; it's the reason the pawn shop has Mommy's ring for sale.

C is for 'Crime.' It's what Daddy does to pay for food, toilet paper and soap; he'd get a regular job if he wasn't such a dope.

D is for 'Drugs.' Daddy isn't a pharmacist, but he's sold many drugs; he isn't a model, but he's posed for many mugs.

E is for 'Escape.' That's what Daddy's always trying to do; breaking out of prison or smoking a joint or two.

F is for 'Fool.' Applying for work, Daddy listed his previous job as 'felon'; those drugs have turned his brain into a watermelon.

G is for 'Government." Daddy blames them for all his woes, not all that stuff he puts up his nose.

H is for 'Hunk.' When Mommy married Daddy, he was such a hunk; then he took drugs and everything shrunk.

I is for 'Inadequate.' It's what Daddy feels when they lock him up; his cellmate expects him to wear a D-cup.

J is for 'Judgment.' It's how Daddy's time in prison is often spent, trying to figure out what the judge meant.

K is for 'Kilogram.' That's how much cocaine Daddy hid in his pants; he looked like a stud, but only at first glance.

L is for 'Love.' It's the reason Mommy stays with Daddy through thick and thin; the reason Daddy's always kissing his bottle of gin.

M is for 'Marriage.' It's a word Daddy sometimes mixes up with 'Marijuana'; he tried to buy it on our honeymoon in Tijuana.

N is for 'Nearsighted.' Daddy's always nearsighted, seeking short-term gain; if he thought about our future, he'd short-circuit his brain.

O is for 'Orange.' It's what Daddy wears when he's on the prison crew, the only time in life he's brighter than you.

P is for 'Probation.' It's what Daddy got when he committed his first crime, a good opportunity to do it another time.

Q is for 'Quarter.' Daddy tried to sell some crack to a Fed; that's because he used only a quarter of his head.

R is for 'Remorse.' It's what Daddy's expected to show during his trial; when the charges are listed, Mommy wishes he wouldn't smile.

S is for 'Swearing.' It's those four-letter words Daddy likes to use, especially on those nights when he runs out of booze.

T is for 'Testimony.' It's what those people say about Daddy in court; it's like getting an 'F' on a school report.

U is for 'Underachiever.' Daddy hasn't achieved much in his life so far, unless you count those drinking contests at the bar.

V is for 'Visitation.' It's the quality time you spend with Daddy in jail, when he tells you his dinner tastes like uncooked snail.

W is for 'Withdrawal.' It's what Daddy goes through when he hasn't had drugs in a day; he withdraws to the shed and tries to smoke some hay.

X is for 'X-ray.' Once, at the airport, they put Daddy through the x-ray; you'd be amazed what they found under his toupee.

Y is for 'Year.' Daddy had a job for a year in the slammer; he made license plates for the state of Alabama.

Z is for 'Zero.' That's the amount of joy Daddy's drugs have brought; if he were a trash man, we'd be smiling a lot.

updating

heyy ppl sorry abt not being abl to update my blog

it 20% becoz im lazy

30% becoz there is virus in my computer

there goes fifty%

and the 49% bcoz

i dun hav tym to update my blog.

and the last coz

nothing interesting iz happenin in my life now a days reallyy boooooooorriiinng

and ummmm dats ol 4 now

ba baai

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ekam ves mihen ulhelaafa kollaanan baeh kan kan.

like today....

mihaaru comp class ah dheveythy ethaaga blog update kurany

and byda wayy miadhu mee CHILDRENS day Yo

happy childrens day emmehaa kudhinnah

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and

mmm mee gotta go

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salhitha..
sorryy abt da butterflies keke.. luks a lil girlish dhw

dAmN iT..>.>..

its beeeen ssssssooooooooooooooo long dw.
tooo bad...
my computer is infected.
tadaaa
reallyy funnyy.... too funny i forgot to laugh.......
booooo
actually it was my sister hu did this.
she logged into a game site and blah blah blah........
anyway..
im toooo mad to talk abt it.
and.................
urgh.
neva mind
bye
cyaa tc
wish me luck...
im formatting da computer..
good bye blogger cya in a year or sumthing

damn it u stupid sis u %$#@ *^$@!~ &^%#**#&@$#


alrite alrite

im fine
juss calm down
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kaLo gAya mEe JokE aKy Ingey

a heroic space traveler who had just returned from her second mission to Earth.

Minister: "Welcome back, most respected Ruba." (ruba is an alien) and the minister too

Ruba: "Thank you, most honorable minister. I am thrilled to be back. I can't tell you how much I missed being among civilized creatures."

Minister: "Is that so? It was my hope that humans would be quite civilized by now. This is a new millennium for them, is it not?"

Ruba (laughs uncontrollably for five minutes): "New millennium! Ha ha ha! Humans are no more civilized in the new millennium than they were in the old millennium. They still kill each other in great numbers, then refer to lions and tigers as 'wild animals.'"

Minister: "You mean they haven't made any progress as a species?"

Ruba: "They've made a little progress in science and technology -- mostly in helping teen-agers keep in touch with each other -- but no progress whatsoever in peace and love. During my time on Earth, I witnessed hundreds of conflicts, including Israelis against Palestinians, Americans against Iraqis, Zidane against Materazzi."

Minister: "But don't humans want peace?"

Ruba: "Yes, most humans do want peace. They want it so much, they're willing to fight wars to achieve it."

Minister: "What about love? Don't humans love each other?"

Ruba: "Not as much as they love money. Most humans have one main goal in life: to get rich."

Minister: "But aren't they like us? Don't they want to become rich so they can help the less fortunate?

Ruba: "Well, I heard of one human who won the lottery and said, 'The first thing I'm going to do is sponsor some children in Uganda.' But it turns out that those were HIS children. He was behind on his child support. Most humans, when they get rich, buy themselves a big house, a fancy car and new teeth. Some get new spouses, too."

Minister: "So what happens to the poor?"

Ruba: "Many of them struggle to survive. In some countries, they don't have enough food to eat."

Minister: "You mean there's a shortage of food on Earth?"

Ruba: "I thought there was, but then I visited America and saw people taking part in an eating contest. They were stuffing hotdogs down their throats, hoping to win a prize in this great new sport. A Japanese man won first place. He ate up his competition."

Minister: "Are there any poor people in America?"

Ruba: "Yes, there are. They get fed twice a year: at Thanksgiving and Christmas."

Minister: "So humans are killing each other and not sharing their food and wealth. Are they at least trying their best to eliminate deadly diseases?"

Ruba: "Yes, they are. America, for example, spent billions from its health budget to eliminate a 'cancer' named Saddam. The American leader believes that Earth is now a much healthier planet."

Minister: "What on Earth is he drinking?"